Have you ever felt like you don’t belong? Like you don’t fit anywhere?
[See my previous post, “Morning Prayer: When I Don’t Feel Like I Fit Anywhere”].
Actually, feeling out of place CAN be a good thing. Let me tell you how God delivered me…
Several years ago, our church group met to conclude our year long study in the important letter to the Hebrews. A memory came flooding my mind as we discussed one of the concluding exhortations found in chapter 13:
. . . Jesus suffered and died outside the city gates to make his people holy by means of his own blood. So let us go out to him, outside the CAMP, and bear the disgrace he bore.
For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come.Hebrews 13:12-14 NLT
I had felt “outside the camp” even among the different Christian groups (or “camps”) with whom we had been associated over the years. Somehow it seemed that there was a certain “persona” that was characteristic of each group. And the “in-crowd” all acted the same way, emphasized the same “truths,” used the same vocabulary, often even looking like one another.
I would feel the “under the surface” and sometimes, “overt” pressure to think and believe and, at times, even look the same way to fit in. But it didn’t work for me for long. What had started out to be a good time of growing together, for me often deteriorated into a sort of “depression” or maybe a rebellion of sorts. I would feel like I needed to sell my soul to the group image to really fit in. And I couldn’t do that because God had been working dramatically in my life to free me little by little from what I call “to do list” or checklist Christianity. And it seemed that each group had its own “checklist.”
So finally, I came to the point of crying out to God,
LORD, I don’t fit anywhere!
Then came the quiet reply,
You don’t fit anywhere so you can fit anywhere . . . [read that again slowly]
Why?
. . . because nobody owns you
The Holy Spirit’s words set my soul free! I no longer felt a need “to fit” anywhere, so I could go into a group and just be who God made me to be and who Jesus is in and through me as me . . . not as someone else or some group. I can let Jesus live His loving and serving life in and through me no matter where I am. I am free to take my cues from HIM because HE is the owner of my life.
How about you, dear brother and sister? Do you feel like you don’t fit anywhere? Great news! You can fit anywhere because you don’t fit anywhere. No one owns you . . . except the Lover of your Soul.
Let HIM live and love and serve through you no matter where you are.
Amen.
A song of “Meditation” … just for fun . . . but true…
I would love to hear from you. Please share your thoughts and experiences.
Jan, I can relate. As a child, I truly didn't fit anywhere - I didn't have a good friend until I was in high school. These days many of my closest friends are other writers whose words I read online, as well as my church friends and those from the past with whom I have a shared history. Thankfully, I believe it gets easier to let go of the need to be liked as we age. (At least I'm working at it!)